Over the last 3 weeks I’ve been busy dealing with my financial ditch and haven’t had much time, or the heart really, to post anything. (I’ve mostly kept up with my reader though and there’s been SO much great writing – sorry for not commenting.)
In a nutshell, shortly I’ll be filing for bankruptcy and leaving my home. Temporarily, until I can sort out a place of my own, I’ll be staying half the week with my Boo and the other half in X’s spare room. I won’t go in to the reasons behind these arrangements right now – another time.
Despite my bravado, the reality of my situation floored me this past week. On the upside, I'm bouncing back and starting to feel (again) that actually, it's not the end of the world but a chance to start over and embrace a new chapter in my life. Everyone around me has given me so much love and support and I'm remembering to count my privileges and blessings.
Once the shit settles, I'll have much more time for blogging, so expect to hear lots from me in the future!
I'm down but not out.
QRx
PS I just looked up QR in the dictionary and it says "feisty, unbeatable femme" - that's me!!
A recent post by the gorgeous Essin Em and reading about many other bloggers struggling to pay their bills has prompted me to share something about my own financial situation. (Am I over-sharing lately?!)
I’ve worked all of my adult life and always paid my bills. I’m self employed, I rent my home and I’m in a LOT of debt.
My finances went in to a complete ditch nearly two years ago when I ended a long term relationship and struggled to work through the emotional trauma that ensued. For the last year, there’s been a down turn in my area of business, so the ditch has got deeper.
I’ve done everything I can to sort out my finances and left with no choice, I recently contacted all of my creditors to explain my situation and arrange repayment terms. I’m still waiting to see how this will pan out, I’ve already had to make a formal complaint to one credit card company whose response was….shit actually, but I won’t bore you with the details.
Until a few months ago I was depressed about my situation and obsessing about all of the bad things that might happen to me. I had tears, sleepless nights, the lot, it was making me quite ill. The depression left me when I got so down that the only way was up.
My position now is that as my creditors can’t send me to prison, inflict a terminal illness on me or anyone else, stop my girlfriend, friends & family from loving me etc etc, unless they’re going to be reasonable, they can fuck right off. They won’t get a penny.
See, this is a pride thing. I've always been proudly financially independent and my pride is kicking in again. I refuse to get dragged down by this, I will not become a quivering mess thereby hurting myself and my relationships.
I might sound angry but I’m not. I’m relieved and amused actually. What’s the worst that can happen? Bankruptcy? So, let me get this right…… if I become bankrupt I won’t be able to drive myself in to the ground trying to run my business, pay the tax man extortionate amounts of money, stay in the rat race? What on earth will I do?!..... Bring it on!
This post comes with a warning to all of the financial institutions I owe money to:
